Saturday, March 9, 2013

Recover. Gain Strength. Rejuvenate. BOUNCE BACK!


I am trying to understand what is going on in my mind from past few weeks…. I am in a state of a strange dilemma… kinda suffering… trying super hard to come out of it!

I am being anti-social, destructive, restless, careless, unreasonable, emotionally unavailable, ignorant, cruel, rude and crazy!

It’s a part of me and I don’t mind being so…. But then… the changes in me are scaring me… It’s affecting my work out routine… my professional performance… personal life… and every damn thing!

Whenever, I find myself moving towards darkness and negativity I recall Spiderman III… Where I find negative powers all over me… Ruling my Heart & Mind!

As they say… Life is all about changes and phases…. This is also a phase.. The world is my playground… I am a player who is not in the best form at present but yes, I’ll certainly be fine….

Many good things did happen in last few days… I got my new car… And I am loving it… Though I still love my old one the most…. May be I am fond of the ‘first love thing’…. First job… first car… first home…. First…. Are always very close to my heart and soul…

I guess all I need is… a rejuvenating weekend outing... starting with a long long drive… without phone and net… all alone…. Isolation therapy is good at times…. I need to be alone…. Just me... my coffee… my camera… my running…. Myself!

I need to be with me… I feel I am running from myself… I don’t give a damn to people who don’t matter to me… but I am really concerned about certain people…. I think that’s what is bothering me like hell..

I wanna indulge in all good things where I can recharge myself back.... bring me back on track… I wanna listen to myself… Wanna spend time with my inner self… Together we’ll have good time… long walks, music, coffee, dark chocolates, photography… blogging, running.. And much more….

Dear God, please give me strength and guide me in the right direction…. I need you to be with me…. Your girl is missing you... Love you...