Over the past few years, I never felt like writing down my year. In fact, I did jot down my thoughts as drafts but never felt right posting them on my blog. The main reason was that they were often filled with deep and dark emotions. Most were written with tearful eyes. Regardless, those drafts will always be dear to me. Someday, if I feel like going anonymous on the internet with a new blog, I might publish them. :)
Coming back to 2023, my year was full of emotions. The first few months were crazy sad, and I truly lived in a dark era. I think those were more of a continuation of the past few years. Anyway, in March 2023, I decided to go to New Zealand for my second Masters. I secured a seat in a sought-after course at the University of Auckland, and I was on cloud 9. I was weaving dreams of going to Auckland, living a free and beautiful life in a gorgeous country with mountains and sea. I started interacting with my course coordinator, had my university email id and student login created. Just before submitting my fees, I had to cancel the plan. Once again, it was to save something I could never have saved anyway, and when I look back, I feel fortunate certain things ended for good.
After saying goodbye to my NZ dream, I forgot about going out of the country and started focusing on my health, which had been going downhill for the past 2 years. I went back to the gym, restarted my yoga practice after a good break, and I was happy. I was just self-involved; I had my breakdowns but overall, I was positive. I did things I wanted to, bought myself a beautiful watch, and soon I got to know that my brother was moving to the US. He secured admission in the course he was looking for, and all of a sudden, everything changed. He actually secured admission in 2 universities, one in Asia and the other one in the States, but he chose to go to the US. I was busy helping him plan and pack for his journey while being clueless about mine.
Soon enough, I got the news that I could go to Canada. My application was through, and the option came out of nowhere. I completely ruled out this possibility, a long story but it was a miracle, and I had an option I always wanted but never thought I would get.
My brother was leaving on June 15th, and till that day, I had no clue on what I was going to do. I focused on his journey, and after dropping him off at the airport, I was sitting and thinking what I should do. I started looking for tickets to Canada with no fixed plan in mind. While looking for tickets, I recalled a lady I met in Bali; she was from Toronto, and we are still friends. She was on her solo birthday trip to Bali and gifted herself a luxury experience for her 50th birthday. She flew business class and stayed in a 5-star property (that's where I was staying while volunteering). She explained that journey as the best journey in her 50 years of life, and that business class, the way she explained, I could never forget.
While looking for my Canada ticket, I thought I should gift myself this business class experience now; why wait to live until I am 50! And I booked myself a comfortable business class on a good international flight. I was definitely scared. Canada was far, very far from India. Not that I was scared of traveling alone, but I think in the last few years, I completely forgot who I was, what I was like, and what I was capable of.
I gave myself 10 days to pack and prepare. And in no time, I was in Canada.
Those were my first 6 months in India; I landed here at the end of June, and from that day, things changed. Ghosts from the past followed me till here, and I had dark, sleepless nights, panic attacks, and a really hard time for the initial few months. I used to sit here and wait for my family to get up and talk to them. I never felt this low in my life ever, and I was on my own, all alone for the first time.
I am thankful for how everything unfolded for me here. Soon enough, when I started being myself again, everything just changed. I ended up receiving more than I could think of; I ended up finding a decent apartment in the location I wanted, secured a fine job (I came here with my India job, and worked nights sticking to the India time zone, it was crazy).
I wanted to list down things I tried for the first time in my life in 2023; many things changed for me here, and I have penned down some of them below:
Business Class Travel - I think that was the highlight of my year and after traveling business class, I find it hard to look back to economy. My journey was so good; I didn't care about the destination. My luggage was lost, but I was still happy. I was miles away from home in Calgary without luggage, with jet lag, and still smiling. I waited for my luggage for 2 days and started buying the essentials which I claimed back from the airlines. Luckily, I got my luggage back in 8 days.
Calgary Stampede - Stampede is like Diwali here. The biggest festival they celebrate. It's a 10-day long event and crazily massive. When I landed here everyone said you came at the wrong time, it's gonna be super crowded and messy in the city and they were not wrong. I ended up loving the entire Stampede vibe and volunteered in the event. Loved every bit of it! Even though my schedule was hectic, I had an Indian job from 9 pm to 7 am and did volunteer work during the daytime. Pheww! Insane!
Improv - I always wanted to learn acting, while searching for a school I came across an improv lab and their upcoming course on “Intro to Improv ''. I am an introvert, and doing things like these really scare me, and that was a good enough reason to give it a shot. It was painful for me initially but became easier with every class. Plus point was I managed to secure myself a good scholarship. Thanks to my sales skills.
New Cuisines - I ended up trying a lot of new cuisines here. For the first time I tried Thai, Vietnamese, Venezuelan, Mediterranean, Peruvian cuisines here! I really liked Thai & Vietnamese. I am already in love with Mexican & Italian. My list definitely expanded here.
New Drinks - Eggnog, I tried for the first time here. I don't know if they used to introduce new coffee seasonal flavors in India, but here I have developed this habit of buying a coffee and walking with it. Because of which I ended up trying many small/big coffee shops here and explored all their seasonal flavors starting with Pumpkin spice latte to Sugar cookie oat latte, which by the way is my favorite now! <3
First Snowfall - I have been on many snow treks in India, but here for the first time I saw snow pouring down and I loved it. It was much more beautiful than I expected. I never thought I would experience this alone for the first time, but I did and it was mesmerizing.
Banff - Another place I never thought I would experience alone but I did and loved it. I didn't go alone as such but it was not how I visualized it for myself. Anyhow, the experience was beautiful beyond words.
Winter hike - In India, I always used to wonder why we climb for 6-7 days, sleep in tents to reach a place so gorgeous, I used to wish for shorter hikes with beautiful views and to come back and sleep in my cozy bed. That wish is fulfilled. Here, you need to walk hardly 10-15 kms (to & fro) to reach a strikingly beautiful place and come back, and another 2-4 hours for reaching the site and coming back to the city. Couldn't have asked for more. Experienced 3 hikes here in the last year! :)
Music - This is my favorite; after coming here I wanted to explore better music and clicked on “Iconic 80s hits” playlist on Prime music and there was no looking back. I am in love! This music is just mind-blowing, and I wish I was alive in that era, I wish this was my college days' music! It's just so beautiful, all these songs.. my God! I already am an old soul and I found my old soul music. Of course I am a big fan of Md Rafi & Kishore Kumar, but this playlist is something else. Next will be 70s music once I will get enough of 80s!
Well, this was my year in nutshell. I also tried Kooza for the first time here; it's like a musical circus show which costed me a bomb! :P
I am really grateful for everything; though these days I do feel a lot homesick. I hope I will get better!
Dear God, I love you and am thankful for everything you have done for me; please take good care of my people. Love you! Muah :))
