Showing posts with label searching myself. Show all posts
Showing posts with label searching myself. Show all posts

Monday, April 10, 2017

Palomino!

Palomino is a name of a book written by Danielle Steele.

Some stories just touch our heart and we can’t get over them.

Palomino is one such story. It happened to me during my graduation days.

One day, I was casually talking to my friend about books and she suggested me to read Palomino. I borrowed it from her and read it, loved every bit of it.

I read few more books after that but nothing touched me like this one, I sensed every emotion deeply within. I cried, smiled and lost myself in the scenes I visualised while reading it. I lived every word of it with all my heart.

For last 3 years, I was emotionally dead... I missed being the girl I used to be, stupid, dumb and emotional fool. I was searching for the old me again. In quest of finding myself, I was doing things I used to do earlier, I visited my college campus, met old friends, tried cooking again, listened to old songs and blah blah...

When nothing worked, I decided to read Palomino again.

It’s not easy living a life with no feelings when you know it's not you, plus in last 3 years I met people who were way too practical in their lives... which further reassured me that I am a fool who even miss being emotional. :P

I searched for Palomino online and luckily got it on Amazon.

Yayy, I finally had own copy of my long lost love.

I started reading it every night.... I again visualised every word but this time the picture was different than the last time... Yes, I remembered the story I lived years back and every scene exactly how I visualised at that point of time.

This time the rooms were different, the house, the ranch, mansion, the flowers decorated were different, the scenes were picturised more realistically in my imagination and the story looked much more real than last time, this time the emotions were deeper and different... Yes, I cried again, I smiled again and I felt it again but with more intensity. I was happy and my frequencies were different now. (Yea, I talk Radio language :P)

To briefly describe Palomino (since the topic is Palomino, I think I should :P), Palomino is a breed of a horse. It’s a love story with ups and downs, it’s not just about roses and romance, it’s about the thorns and the dark side as well. It’s about losing everything and getting over it, moving on to something which was forever... losing hopes and finding it back... Oh! It’s just amazing.

Palomino is strong story of a tough woman. I loved it again and connected with it at a different wavelength, stronger than before.

I think I should try to sleep now.


Dear God, you know I love you. Please take care of my people. Please help my Grandpa recover soon and please please be there with him. I promise I’ll be a good girl. Muuuaah :-)

Sunday, November 16, 2014

For old times' sake! :)

Sometimes, in fact most of the times, I really find myself paralysed when its about expressing anything... I am really a difficult human being and I hate myself for being so...

I try so hard at times to say or do certain things which I just can’t do... It’s like an injury or a disability... disability of expressing me to the people who matter the most... :-(

Yesterday, I went to my college campus with an old friend of mine... It sounds funny but yes, I am in search of my self... What I was... what I am.... what happened... what changed.... and what not... I know I am crazily weird at times but that’s ok... I should like myself... the way I am... Rest, doesn’t really matter! :P

So, since I was going through this emotional turmoil... And was trying to figure out what actually is wrong with me I decided to look back.... back in time where I was truly happy... I know I was a very different individual at that point of time but, I need to understand me.... discover more of myself...
I decided to go back to my campus... I miss my college days... So, I along with my friend decided to live one day... the way we used to live 7 years back...

I wore my sports shoes, took my fone, some cash in pocket (like I used to do in college) and took metro for my campus... I reached there by 10.30am... Met my friend there and we started walking towards our breakfast junction.... On the way, I was searching for “bhelpuri wale uncle”... He wasn’t there so I asked another vendor standing there about him; I got to know that he comes around 1pm... I was happy to know he is all well...

We reached our old adda for breakfast and asked for “meetha samosa” the guy said it was out of stock and they’ll be making it soon again... We ordered “aloo samosa”, tea & my black coffee... finished it and proceeded...

On the way, we ate our desi burger from a thela... And continued walking towards a decent place to sit... we went to our old place where we used to eat... but it was locked... We visited our department in Science faculty... And finally, we decided to sit inside the law faculty campus... We sat there and talked for almost 2 hours... About how life changed, our learnings from job life and so on...

We realized it was 1pm.... bhelpuri time.... So, we started walking... I saw uncle, he was looking old and weak.... He recognised me instantly... I wanted to ask him for photo but somehow, I find it impossible to say things which I should... We ate bhelpuri... All the while, I was thinking of asking uncle for a picture but I was not able to... while leaving... I clicked his picture where he was surrounded by people...

We decided to go to our college and sit there... We went to our college canteen and ate our favourite “triangle wala dosa” with flavoured milk... We then decided to sit there for some time... Again we continued sharing about life and happenings and we realised it was 4.30pm...

We headed towards our favourite “Pastry shop” and ordered our favourite “Rum ball”... finished it and decided to take a round of “Kamla Nagar Market”... It was truly nostalgic... though it changed a lot in 7 years... I purchased “Anklets” for my Goa collection.... While leaving market we saw “Giani’s” and ate ice-cream...

My friend said, “Main ja raha hun meethe samose khaane, tera kya plan hai” it was so like him... And I replied, “mera bhi yehi plan hai” and we started walking towards our destination.... We ate our “Meethe Samose” and it was 6pm...

We decided to leave for home.... So, we waved hands and took our respective metros...

I luckily got seat in metro and as usual I was lost in my thoughts... And realised I reached my destination...

I was a great day indeed... I was not carrying my camera so I clicked few pics from my fone which I am going to share... Each one with a story to tell....




























Thank you God, once again for everything... Love you! Bless my people... :-)